Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Please forgive me but...

Stop Talking!...I wish I could say this to people without looking like a complete and total bitch.
There are some people out there that are 100% okay with telling you every intimate detail of their life. I'm sorry but eww lady I DO NOT want to hear about your affair with the trucker down in PA, and how his "lovin" makes your skin tingle for days...ew ew ew fun-kay. Ugh, seriously, stop talking...Apparently I am some kind of magnet to these "people". When in your odd shaped little head did it seem totally normal to blurt out the fact that
"Hey last weekend we meet up at our spot and that truck was a rockin, and I got some great shots with my new digital camera!" (EWW!!)
Ughhh...by this point I have put on my imaginary ear muffs over my ears scanning my desk for an object I could quickly and painlessly end my life at that particular moment.

Whyyy are you still talking lady? Just stop, save yourself the embarrassment. The most insane part of this is, it's nothing out of the norm for her...to her it is not embarrassing nor is it considered poor taste...eww she is still talking...If she talks to me like this could you imagine what she may discuss with her co-workers, or a hair dresser for that matter....

I think she has stopped..and now I am sitting here like a deer in the headlights racking my brain with something to reply to all this......

A fake cheesy grin and.. "Will it be Cash Check or Charge?"

3 comments:

Kathleen M. said...

AHAHAH!! how his 'lovin' makes your skin tingle for days?! What the fuck!!! I would have mixed feelings about someone telling me that. I would be a)Disgusted and b)jelous in a weird effed up manner but c)extremely wtfed

haha love it!
Kathleen from Delightfully Deranged

kurt&meg said...

I have a tendency to be one of those talker people but I am also on the other end of it sometimes- you definitely come from our family. You have limitless talents Ash-glad to know you are using them. And you are still cute as bugs ears-love meg

Anonymous said...

Hahaha, fucking great, hilarious even. I have added a link to your blog on my myspace